I can't believe it's been over a month since I posted on this thing. We've been incredibly busy with the move, activities going on in the ministry and, of course, bringing our son home from Michigan. It's good to have him home. But in all honesty, I did not miss the "three-siblings-pickin'-on-each-other" thing while he was away. I suppose it's all a part of sibling rivalry, huh?
A couple of nights ago, I was talking to the oldest, and he tends to be the typical teenage boy; making crude jokes with his goofy friends, laughing at things that most "refined" folks would consider inappropriate, and more often than not, are offensive to my "gentile" sensibilities. ;o) He had made a comment about something we were watching on TV. There were these two men living the bachelor life, and they were having dates over. My son said something like, "Yeah...my friend and me will be just like that (using his poor grammar and all here)...we'll have our own place and have chicks over ever night. It'll be sweet!"
Now any other night, I probably would have just blown it off. But I have been feeling such conviction in my own life lately, about how much we are entertained, and even laugh at sin. So, I just sorta snapped. I mean, I didn't begin yelling or anything, but I just began weeping. Have I trained this child to think that living a life of sinful pleasures will just be no big deal?? Have I been so apathetic about what I've watched and enjoyed, that he now thinks that he has no choice but to "enjoy" sowing his wild oats? :o/ Is there something else I should have been doing to help him understand that sin is a destroyer of life, and not something to play around with?
As I began trying to explain how I felt to him, I realized that he was really hearing nothing. He sorta rolled his eyes and gave me the "okay, sitting through another mommy rant" look that I have just grown to detest. So I stopped mid-thought, and just said, "Someday we'll talk about this seriously, and I hope it's not too late." :o(
I cried myself to sleep that night. But as I lay there praying, "Lord, Lord...please let him understand," another thought came to me. My children are responsible for their own convictions and beliefs, yes. I know I can only offer them the truth, but that doesn't mean that they HAVE to accept it as such. But, I don't have to spend time enjoying the very things that I know can eat them alive. It'll be a monumental task, especially because I do love watching TV and movies with the kids so much. But I've made my decision, kids...
Don't expect me to laugh at your killer. :o/